NFLOL: Sean Keane blindsides Week 8 of NFL Football
My weekly NFL column is up. An excerpt:
Eagles 40, Giants 17
The Eagles-Giants clash took place across the street from where the Phillies and Yankees would face off a few hours later. That meant twelve straight hours of drinking for Philadelphia fans. This game was never in doubt, as the Eagles jumped out to such a big lead, the only way they could have blown it was to bring in Brad Lidge to run the Wildcat in the 4th quarter. I don’t know how that would work - somehow Johnny Damon catches a shotgun snap and runs it back for a TD because Lidge isn’t paying attention and wanders away from the line of scrimmage, and Ryan Howard whiffs on a tackle.
Meanwhile, the pseudo-Seans again had a field day for Philadelphia. DeSean Jackson caught a long TD pass, and LeSean McCoy had a 66-yard touchdown run. The lesson? The Phillies could have used third baseman Chone Figgins to chase down Johnny Damon later that night.
Baltimore 30, Denver 7
The Broncos fell from the ranks of the undefeated, thanks to a game-breaking kickoff return by Lardarius Webb, which is the first time in NFL history “Darius” has been preceded by that particular phoneme. In the first quarter, Ed Reed hit Knowshon Moreno so hard, Moreno thought he was back at Georgia for the rest of the first half. More like No-shon, amirite people?
This game ended up a rout, the point that Mercury Morris decided to go wine shopping in the fourth quarter. Morris, along with the other veterans of the 1973 Miami Dolphins have a tradition where they open a bottle of champagne once the last undefeated team in the league loses, to preserve their place in NFL history. The 2007 Patriots veterans have a similar tradition, where they open a bottle and pour it and then Justin Tuck bursts in and slaps the glasses out of their hands and also somehow David Tyree is balancing a full magnum of Dom Perrignon on top of his head.
